People send mental messages to themselves all throughout the day. These messages are called “affirmations” because they affirm and reinforce ideas. Sending yourself negative affirmations will increase your stress level. Sending yourself positive affirmations will help you to feel more peaceful. When we know a situation is going to be unpleasant, we often tell ourselves how awful or terrible it is going to be. As a result, we may actually cause the situation to be just as bad as we think or worse.
Coping statements are truthful positive statements used to replace the negative and untrue thoughts that take-over when you feel anxious, stressed, angry and/or when facing other overwhelming situations. Coping statements can help decrease anxiety, depression, and negative self-judgment. When we’re especially upset, it’s easy to get caught up in our negative, self-defeating thoughts, so it’s important to counter-act them with healthier responses. Even if the statements feel awkward or untrue at first, try to keep repeating them often; the more you use them, the more they will become the “tape” in your head, rather than your old loop. Remember, it took you years to entrench your now habitual negative thoughts and behaviors; it takes time and consistency to create new habits. The good news is that the human brain is quite plastic, so we can actually re-condition ourselves and create new neural pathways.
That’s why preparing coping statements and writing them onto coping cards that you carry with you makes sense. Whenever negative self-talk gets you down, pull out your coping card and read your positive affirmations until you feel better. It sounds too simple to work, but it does work, and since it’s so simple, you can make your own cards right now.
Writing a Coping Card
It’s all well and good to write out coping statements – but who can remember to use them, or even remember them at all – in the heat of the moment?!!
Because it is difficult to remember your coping statements once you start feeling overwhelmed, it is helpful to write out a number of statements on a small card that you can carry around easily in your pocket at all times.
With this card on you at all times, you can pull it out and read the statements to yourself whenever you need to – no memory required.
You may want to write out different cards for different situations that provoke stress or panic – or whatever you struggle with. The cards work best when filled with statements that specifically apply to you and to the situations you face.
Tips for Writing a Coping Card
Write the statements in your own words – not in language you wouldn’t use or don’t feel comfortable with (avoid formal or academic language.)
Write statements that specifically target your problem – if you are stressed out over a presentation, write about that.
Write statements that are reassuring, but also realistic and truthful. If you struggle with pain, repeating, “I don’t feel pain” probably won’t help (you won't fool yourself.) A more accurate and thus more useful statement, might be, “This pain won’t last forever.”
Keep statements brief and easy to memorize – so you won’t have trouble remembering and repeating your statement when feeling overwhelmed (when you need them most.)
How to Use your Coping Statements
Use your statements whenever you feel stress, panic, feelings of being overwhelmed, etc., coming on.
If using your statements to beat out negative thoughts in a crisis situation:
Read them out loud (if possible) and repeat them until you start to feel better.
If one statement in particular helps calm you most, just continue to repeat that statement to yourself.
Try to breathe slowly and deeply as you read your statements.
Examples of Coping Statements
-I’ve done this before so I can do it again.
-I’ll be glad I did it when this is over.
-I’ll feel better when I am actually in the situation.
-I’ll just do the best I can.
-By facing my fears I can overcome them.
-Worry doesn’t help.
-Whatever happens, happens. I can handle it
-I can feel stress and still deal with this situation.
-This is not a real emergency. I can slow down and think about what I need to do.
-This feeling will go away.
-By staying present and focused on my task, my stress will decrease.
-Things are not as bad I am making them out to be.
-Don’t discount the positives.
-Stay focused on the present. What do I need to do right now?
-It will soon be over.
-It’s not the worst thing that could happen.
-Step by step until it’s over.
-I don’t need to eliminate stress, just keep it under control.
-Once I label my stress from 1 to 10, I can watch it go down.
-Take a breath.
-I need to stay focused on the positives.
-People aren’t against me, they’re for themselves
Can you think of a positive coping statement you think would be helpful? In the comments sections, write down a negative self talk statement followed by a coping statement you may use to combat it.
Coping statements are truthful positive statements used to replace the negative and untrue thoughts that take-over when you feel anxious, stressed, angry and/or when facing other overwhelming situations. Coping statements can help decrease anxiety, depression, and negative self-judgment. When we’re especially upset, it’s easy to get caught up in our negative, self-defeating thoughts, so it’s important to counter-act them with healthier responses. Even if the statements feel awkward or untrue at first, try to keep repeating them often; the more you use them, the more they will become the “tape” in your head, rather than your old loop. Remember, it took you years to entrench your now habitual negative thoughts and behaviors; it takes time and consistency to create new habits. The good news is that the human brain is quite plastic, so we can actually re-condition ourselves and create new neural pathways.
That’s why preparing coping statements and writing them onto coping cards that you carry with you makes sense. Whenever negative self-talk gets you down, pull out your coping card and read your positive affirmations until you feel better. It sounds too simple to work, but it does work, and since it’s so simple, you can make your own cards right now.
Writing a Coping Card
It’s all well and good to write out coping statements – but who can remember to use them, or even remember them at all – in the heat of the moment?!!
Because it is difficult to remember your coping statements once you start feeling overwhelmed, it is helpful to write out a number of statements on a small card that you can carry around easily in your pocket at all times.
With this card on you at all times, you can pull it out and read the statements to yourself whenever you need to – no memory required.
You may want to write out different cards for different situations that provoke stress or panic – or whatever you struggle with. The cards work best when filled with statements that specifically apply to you and to the situations you face.
Tips for Writing a Coping Card
Write the statements in your own words – not in language you wouldn’t use or don’t feel comfortable with (avoid formal or academic language.)
Write statements that specifically target your problem – if you are stressed out over a presentation, write about that.
Write statements that are reassuring, but also realistic and truthful. If you struggle with pain, repeating, “I don’t feel pain” probably won’t help (you won't fool yourself.) A more accurate and thus more useful statement, might be, “This pain won’t last forever.”
Keep statements brief and easy to memorize – so you won’t have trouble remembering and repeating your statement when feeling overwhelmed (when you need them most.)
How to Use your Coping Statements
Use your statements whenever you feel stress, panic, feelings of being overwhelmed, etc., coming on.
If using your statements to beat out negative thoughts in a crisis situation:
Read them out loud (if possible) and repeat them until you start to feel better.
If one statement in particular helps calm you most, just continue to repeat that statement to yourself.
Try to breathe slowly and deeply as you read your statements.
Examples of Coping Statements
-I’ve done this before so I can do it again.
-I’ll be glad I did it when this is over.
-I’ll feel better when I am actually in the situation.
-I’ll just do the best I can.
-By facing my fears I can overcome them.
-Worry doesn’t help.
-Whatever happens, happens. I can handle it
-I can feel stress and still deal with this situation.
-This is not a real emergency. I can slow down and think about what I need to do.
-This feeling will go away.
-By staying present and focused on my task, my stress will decrease.
-Things are not as bad I am making them out to be.
-Don’t discount the positives.
-Stay focused on the present. What do I need to do right now?
-It will soon be over.
-It’s not the worst thing that could happen.
-Step by step until it’s over.
-I don’t need to eliminate stress, just keep it under control.
-Once I label my stress from 1 to 10, I can watch it go down.
-Take a breath.
-I need to stay focused on the positives.
-People aren’t against me, they’re for themselves
Can you think of a positive coping statement you think would be helpful? In the comments sections, write down a negative self talk statement followed by a coping statement you may use to combat it.